cAt-cAt MEoW’s Blog

I say life is so unfair

Because I love someone

who doesn’t care

He’s been on my mind every hour, everyday

And just close to him

is where I want to stay

I have never felt this way before

And seeing him always makes me love him more

“He’s so insensitive”;

“He’s such a dumb”

But because of him

I have become a numb

My friends tell me

he doesn’t deserve me

And that he’s just a nothing,

a nobody maybe

These words got stuck inside my mind

Yet still I admire him with reasons I can’t find

I remember all these years

that passed

So now I truly disagree with

“1^st impression never lasts”

For long ago

he’s just a silly friend

But look at me now with heartaches so hard to mend

Was it because he’s very nice?

Or maybe just

of his twinkling eyes?

Could also be his gentle voice?

That makes me say,

“He is my choice!”

Another maybe

is his loving gesture

That made me felt

I’m a special treasure

But honestly I really don’t know

The innermost reason

why I like him so

As far as I can remember

it happened really fast

For just a night,

how flattering it was

That time he’s just

my old time pal

And I for him was a simple gal

I just stayed with him

to talk for a while

But looks like I got drown

with his crazy smile

Next thing indeed was a history

That I had even wrote on my diary

I’m supposed only

to comfort him

Because I guess that’s his saddest night

that I’ve ever seen

I cheered him up

to ease his pain

Shame on me now,

the one in vain

At first I thought

I was just confused

With this feeling inside

that is about to boost

I said that I

just pity him so bad

Now falling for him was the hardest thing I had

Can’t believe that liking him would be possible

I think about him

above almost all

All the stupid favors

he had asked me to do

Are done at my pleasure

just for him to like me too

But how come I’m not

treated the same?

Is there something about me

he is to be ashamed?

Or still the reason is

his former love,

Which still brings him back

to the feelings they have?

I get jealous

when they’re together

Although I know

they are official lovers

What pain it brings

when they are happy

Though I’m the one who teases them with a heart

crying silently

How joyous I am

when they broke up

All those following days,

I laugh and laugh

Then a hope grew deep inside my heart

That finally in his busy life

I’ll have a part

Still I was treated just the same

And if ever I’ll be his girl would be just a game

Meaning, he is truly a fool

Doesn’t he know the golden rule?

I tried to ignore

the feeling inside

When I see him comes

I try to hide

Still this move doesn’t help a lot

For I can’t resist

the feeling of craving I got

Another thing that bothers me again

Is that if he and his ex

are really insane

After all the hates

and the cursing words

Their back to the love scene

that make me bored

Their back again to give me pain

Yet I’m the only one

who is to be blame

For nobody knows what I’m going through

That I get hurt to see those two

Until now I promised to treat them right

As sweet as possible

just not to start a fight

A ready-to-listen- friend to the girl I envy

And for the guy I love,

a comforting -dependable- martyr,

a “girlfriend wannabe” maybe

I don’t know when this sacrifice would last

I just want to let

the heavy days move fast

Maybe by that

I’ll easily move on

And just try to make our relationship as FRIENDS

be strong

Would you now agree?

I was treated wrong

I’m taken for granted

by the one I long

I have loved him so

with all honesty

But what had happened to me now was all but a misery

Now I want to be hurt no more

Because I have this few words for you boy,

“I’m worth waiting for”…